I’ve grown accustom to doing things around the house while carrying the baby. That’s right, cooking, cleaning, helping, and playing all while holding my 2-month old. And, when I need two arms, I’ll place her in the sling and carry her on my chest. She’s almost always with me.
The other morning I was toting her around while trying to cook breakfast and entertain my 5-year old, 3-year old and 1-year old. Things got overwhelming fast and I found myself on the brink of a mental meltdown. While bouncing the baby on my hip, flipping pancakes, and breaking up an argument between my oldest two, I cried out to Jesus. “Please help me!” I functioned through tears as I looked around at the mess on the counters and the mess on the floor. The sounds of my little one crying, my older children screaming, and music playing in the background were rushing to my ears and crippling my mind. I couldn’t think clearly. But, then something beautiful happened. I felt His presence swoop in and a warmth swell on my shoulder. I knew it was Him. I knew it was my Jesus reassuring me—telling me He was always with me.
When breakfast finally made it to the table I soothed my baby and nursed her. My oldest three stuffed their faces while an empty plate sat in front of me. I didn’t care about eating. I was just relieved to know that my children were taken care of. I looked down at my nursing infant who smiled up at me. I smiled back at her, but I wanted to see her better.
You see, I’m near-sighted and had my glasses on. Wearing them helps me see things that are further away from me, but it sometimes distorts the things that are up close and personal. I need them off for intimate and close connections or else I can’t see what’s right in front of me.
As I pulled my glasses up onto my head, my baby’s face came into focus and my heart melted. Everything that overwhelmed my mind rushed from my soul and poured out like a river from my eyes.
“Can you see me now?”I heard Him speak to me.
Oh, Jesus, there You are. I’ve grown so accustomed to doing life with You that I sometimes forget to focus my eyes on You—to really look at You—to be intimate with You.
Like I’ve held my infant in my arms while taking care of life at home, I’ve carried Christ close to me. I haven’t ever let go of Him. But, in the midst of it all, I’ve let my attention be focused on what I’m doing rather than Who I’m doing it with. And, when I lose that focus I lose my clarity—my clarity of purpose and my clarity of mind.
This leads me to think about King Nebuchadnezzar in Daniel chapter 4. He brought his focus away from God and forgot that it was only by God’s favor that he had been given a kingdom to rule on earth. Because of this, his sanity was taken from him. He quite literally lost his mind. It wasn’t until he looked up and focused heavenward that his mind returned to him.
“…I, Nebuchadnezzar, looked up to heaven. My sanity returned, and I praised and worshiped the Most High and honored the One who lives forever.”(Daniel 4:34 NLT)
I looked up…my sanity returned…
Accept, God sent His son to earth to break the barrier between the physical and the spiritual. Now I don’t have to look so far away because Christ dwells within me (Colossians 1:27, Ephesians 3:17). So my focus has to be drawn into a closeness—into an intimacy with Him. And, I felt this, like scales coming off my eyes when I removed the physical glasses from my face. The stress disappeared. The anxiety melted away. Clarity of purpose and clarity of mind was returning to me.
Christ never told me that He would make my life easy. He didn’t promise me a life without stress or anxiety, but He did tell me that He would be with me. And, that alone brings me comfort because He is my greatest helper. He is the reason why I have everything that I have, and He is the reason why I can do everything that I do.
“…I am with you always [remaining with you perpetually—regardless of circumstance, and on every occasion], even to the end of the age.”(Matthew 28:20 AMP)
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