Both of my baby girls have been sick with a cold for about a week now. It just so happened, however, that this past week was one of the busiest weeks for events surrounding the upcoming holidays. I missed two Christmas concerts, one Christmas play, and a luncheon with friends because I stayed home to take care of my girls. I was tempted to resent the fact that I needed to stay home with my sick babies. My heart felt so torn, especially when my husband and my two boys were able to go to three of the four events without us.
My mom and my husband both sent me videos from all of the events I missed. I was also able to watch part of one on a social media live-stream. It helped, but it just wasn’t the same as being there with everyone. I think my mom could sense my disappointment, and she sent me a message ensuring me that “you’ve got the very best going on right there where you are.” I needed to hear that.
This morning my 2-year old cried when my husband and her brothers left for church. “I want to come to church too,” she cried, and I confided in her that I was sad too. After all, I wanted to go just as badly. Just then my phone buzzed. It was another message from my mom with an image of an animated woman snuggled up on a big pillow with a smile on her face and the letters “J-O-M-O” written across the top.
Now, before I tell you what JOMO means, let me tell you about its opposite counterpart. If you’re familiar with modern acronyms then you’ve probably heard of FOMO, which stands for “fear of missing out.” This is the feeling of discontentment that I get when I want to be somewhere else other than exactly where I am. FOMO causes resentment and a sense of uneasiness. It steals the joy away from the present moments. It takes happiness and creativity away from my current life. It makes it so that I cannot be fully present in the present because I’m too busy thinking about where I’m not rather than where I am.
JOMO on the other hand…well, this was the first time I’ve ever heard of JOMO. It’s the joy of missing out. The definition described on the picture my mom sent me this morning was this: “feeling content with staying in and disconnecting…” Joy sounds so much better than fear. Yes, I want to choose this. I want to choose joy.
But, honestly, why does it have to be so hard to choose joy? Why do I have such a hard time being content with where I am…even if it’s not exactly where I want to be? Wait a minute, though. It’s not that I don’t want to be with my babies, and it’s not that I don’t want to be home. It’s just that I also want to be somewhere else. Ugh! I feel torn, but I want joy. Unfortunately, with this kind of FOMO attitude I’m not just missing out on where I want to be, but also where I already am. Double ugh!
I realized this today when my daughter asked me to read a book with her. I was too busy trying to pay attention to the live-stream of service while cleaning up the kitchen and holding a boogery baby, that I was missing out on just celebrating the time I had with both of my girls. What joy can come from this? If I keep this up I’m really going to miss out…I’m going to miss out on the joy that God has for me right here and right now.
Psalm 16:11 says that in God’s presence there is fullness of joy! (Psalm 16:11 NKJV) Well, isn’t God literally everywhere?
“…Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you
wherever you go.” (Joshua 1:9 NLT)
“Honor and majesty surround Him; Strength and joy fill His dwelling.”
(1 Chronicles 16:27 NLT)
I wasn’t meant to struggle with fear-of-missing-out. I was made to live in His presence with the fullness of His joy! Which means that everywhere, literally anywhere I am I can have the fullness of joy! And, if I accept this gift of joy that God so freely gives with His presence, than I am also able to give this gift of joy to the people I am already with.
I experienced that today when I decided to just be with my daughters. And, after my 9-month old laid down for a nap, my 2-year old and I did our nails, and danced in the living room. She wasn’t crying to be somewhere else anymore. We were both happy and content to be exactly where we were.
One of the best gifts I could ever give is my presence—being fully present with the fullness of joy. I want all of my children to always know that God is with us every second of every day. He never leaves us. He never forsakes us. And, because He is always with us, we are always exactly where we’re supposed to be. And, when I live in this I am stepping into the fullness of joy—the joy that comes with being present and living in His presence.
“You will show me the way of life, granting me the joy of Your presence and the pleasures of living with You forever.” (Psalm 16:11 NLT)
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